Thursday, May 24, 2007

No More Tits-Out Riding...

...at least we're finished with all that. Ladies and gentlemen, I present to you the new Single Speed Outlaw Factory Team (affectionately known as SSOFT—insert cheap one-liner here with obligatory reference to Priapus) race jersey, fresh off the assembly line and reeking of polyester and decal laminate. Three-quarter zip front, tri-pocket back.

Penitentiary pinstripes and, ahem, arresting color scheme, as well as other interesting design elements, courtesy of rickyd. So purty it's gonna turn all other team jerseys green with envy.

Sausage-skin fit courtesy of tyrannous and curiously longstanding European influences, overseas manufacturing practices, too much time on my hands, and perhaps a wee bit of overcompensation for an as-yet undetermined (or at least undisclosed) element. Here's the marketing math: Large "race" fit = Medium "heroin-chic" fit; the la chiva theme is extended to the sleeve ends, which could double as makeshift tourniquets in the event your kit is pinched or there's a run on latex tubing—no, really, check out the jersey's designer, clad in a Medium. Warning: image may not be suitable for viewing at work...ah, hell, be bold!

(Clipper City Brewing Company as a team sponsor...brilliant, by Pan!)

(Photo credit: D. Ross)

11 comments:

gwadzilla said...

did ricky steal those arm warmers from the Hamburgler?

okay...
no Mayor Mc Cheese jokes

Kent said...

Hamburgler.

Haha. That's awesome. I think that should be Ricky's new nickname.

Now if we could only find him the hat and eye mask to race in.

Hjalti said...

Stud.

gwadzilla said...

yo...

steve

which KMC were you saying would be a good chain for my single speeds?

about to compile an order

gwadzilla8
@
yahoo
.
com

Tim Wise said...

Nice Steve. You strike quite a pose. I got one of them coming to me, hopefully soon. I am rocking a KMC Z-410 right now. For the price you can't beat em.

iconoclasst said...

Tim -

Yeah, I suggested the KMC K710 "KOOL" model, in—what else—black and silver. One helluva heavy piece of bike jewelry, but virtually indestructible!

GZ-

Now that I'm paying attention, the KOOL K710 seems to come only in 1/8". I'm running one, but it's on my fixie. Thought that's what you were thinking about building up. If you need 3/32", go with the Z610HX (610 model); supposed to be the shit for 3/32".

Frank Brigandi said...

yeah, great jersey... forego color and embrace the B&W. we did a black and whote jersey this year and it's beautiful....
nice blog too.

gwadzilla said...

I can not even recall what chain I ended up ordering...

but I placed an order
all sorts of parts to try to refresh some of my rides

namely my geared karate monkey
gotta get ready for big bear

you on the SSOFT Big Bear Team?

who is on that lineup?

iconoclasst said...

Ha, I planned to do Big Bear, but the rest of The Big Meats couldn't commit. Now I'm trying to throw together a SSOFT leftovers team. We'll see.

riderx said...

SSOFT leftovers, that would be a great name!

Frank Brigandi said...

OUr jerseys are in,
Joel,
I think KMC makes an SS chain that doesn;t stretch too quickly... forget the model number though..